No, this is not a picture of me.
After all this heavy talk about blogging and balance, I thought it might be time to lighten things up chez Motherese. I mean, come on, it’s almost summer – thanks to temperatures in the 80s and daily thunderstorms, it certainly feels like summer – so it is my pleasure today to bring you the next offering in my Mama Needs a Brand New Bag series: The Cousin It Edition.
You see, friends, even after all of my efforts to kick things up a notch style-wise, I realized that I had been neglecting a very important element of my personal style. And how did I realize this, you ask?
Frederic Fekkai told me.
Repeatedly.
Every time I opened a magazine, there was his ad, reminding me: “Hair is your most important accessory.”
Something told me that Frederic wouldn’t approve of my daily ponytail or the fact that I hadn’t had a haircut in over a year. (Not good. I know. Don’t judge.) So I decided to make an appointment with my stylist to remedy that situation.
I went into my appointment ready to try for a cut and style to help complement and enhance my new fashions – not to mention my scarves, accessories, and perfume – and with a few issues to discuss with my stylist.
1.Tried and true make me blue: I have had essentially the same haircut for twenty years. That’s right: twenty. Ever since I retired my curling iron and Aqua Net and grew out my bangs, I have had long-ish hair. Although it’s been anywhere from my shoulders to halfway down my back in length, the style has been basically the same (wherein same = non-existent).
In high school I sported the half-up/half-down look. (Come to think of it, that’s how I wore my hair on my wedding day too.) Since high school, I’ve been a strong advocate of the ponytail. Rare has been the occasion on which I’ve worn my hair down.
2. BUT I’m a low-maintenance kind of girl: As much as I like the way my hair looks when it’s blown straight and flat-ironed, I know that I will never – never – take the time to use two different electronic devices on my hair every time I wash it. Not going to happen. So I have to resist committing to something new if it means a big uptick in maintenance.
3. I have no idea what my hair type is: Am I alone here? Whenever I see features in magazines about getting the perfect cut or using the perfect products for one’s hair type, I am stymied. My hair isn’t really curly and it isn’t really straight. It isn’t thin, but it’s not really thick. It just kind of is. Inspiring? Not so much.
With these thoughts in mind, I sat down and talked to my stylist before hitting the shampoo sink. Turns out I am normal – or, at least, my hair is: it’s healthy, but will take a little bit of work to get it to go straight or go curly. To maximize my options, Michelle suggested taking off quite a bit of length and adding long layers. She showed me how to play into the curl via scrunching (not my favorite look on me) or how to go almost straight via a quick trick: a giant brush attached to a blow dryer.
I left the salon feeling good. I daresay I left the salon looking good. And lighter too – physically and existentially lighter.
I wore my hair down the rest of the day and the next. I started to think that this change was do-able. (Though Tiny Baby’s wish to play repeated games of Cat’s Cradle with my locks did give me some pause…)
And then the real test came: after Big Boy’s swimming lesson, it was time to try to replicate the straight and smooth look at home. With about five minutes, a little bit of effort, and very few gymnastics, I was able to make my hair look downright presentable.
Five minutes? I can commit to that.
Are you high-maintenance or low-maintenance when it comes to style and your hair? Do you make judgments about people based on their hair? Care to suggest what my daily ponytail (of yore!) says about me?
Image: Cousin It via Flickr by cenz under a Creative Commons license.
{ 45 comments… read them below or add one }
Like you, I know my hair can look GREAT if I spend time blowdrying it and flatironing it. But I really can’t stand the time and effort involved.
Instead of the “ponytail” I have resorted to Mom’s other best friend — short hair. I literally get out of the shower and call it a day. Does it suit me? I doubt it. Does it flatter me? I doubt it. But it looks professional, so it works for me for now. Maybe when the children are older I’ll consider a bob again.
Maybe. :)
At the risk of appearing shallow, may I say, “You go, girl!!” and Hooray, and nice work. Hair is important, in it’s way, and you picked exactly the style I would have advised had you asked. Now, just get it cut every 6-8 weeks and you are good. Yay, you!!
I have the same problem. Ponytail every day. No style and haven’t had any (or the same lack thereof) for 20 years. And no willingness to blowdry every day. Literally a ponytail by 9am every. single. day.
You are an inspiration!
Air dry and three minutes with the straightener is the most I can do regularly. For special occasions I will blowdry and then use the straightener. I have long hair that it is a wavy, but not in the way I can just let it be. I get all frizzy and since I rock the side swept bangs, I have to do something to those corkscrews.
I don’t know if you got bangs or not, but I credit bangs (which take far less time to blowdry or straighten) for making it look like a ponytail or bun is polished as opposed to just accidental.
Congrats on the new Do!
I didn’t get bangs this time around, but I’m tempted. I think the trauma of looking back at pictures of myself in junior high with big hair and bangs makes me wary, but I am a big fan of the side-swept bang look and completely agree that they make a simple style look polished. Maybe next haircut (which will hopefully be in less than a year)?
I do the ponytail. Everyday. A week ago, I got a $12 hair cur, but I’ve worn my hair up since. I don’t like having my hair down around my neck (and I really don’t like it short), so here I am with a messy bun.
That said, I’ve had some pretty interesting hair styles in the past 10 years.
You go! (5 minutes? Um, hello!)
Just had my hair done last night!! Feels so great. I hate getting it done, it seems like such a crazy expense. But then when I do I always feels better. But I’m with you, I’ve had the same cut forever. Used to keep my hair really long. But as I’ve gotten older that has meant a pony-tail every day. So now I have an easy to manage bob. Quick blow dry, easy to style if I really want and presto, momma is ready!
And you should have really posted a photo!
Definitely low-maintainance. I’ve always been a ponytail type of girl. I was very up front with my husband when we first met that I like to wear ponytails. It had actually been an issue in the past with some guys I dated. When I cut my hair off every few years for Locks of Love I can’t wait until it grows out enough to make a ponytail. I just can’t stand my hair toughing my face.
This is delightful!
I went the path of least resistance many years ago – with super short hair – changing that up post-divorce. I needed the change. (And my then 12-year old told me I needed longer hair to get dates.)
Nothing like a new do to make you feel lighter and great! (My now shoulder length hair is rarely in a pony tail, but I do use combs to pull parts back when I want a different look – or it’s just bugging me.)
Here’s to a great stylist and new ideas! (And hoping the Cat’s Cradle episodes are entertaining and not annoying.)
I got a great education in hair when I fired my colorist and started doing it by myself. It’s amazing what you can learn from a book.
The photo actually scared me! Good pick :)
I wore my hair long-ish until I couldn’t fathom giving up another 10 minutes of sleep to do my hair anymore. Now it’s in a bob, but I’m very specific with my stylist – “Please, not a mom bob.”
While I am not religious about maintaining this cut every 6-8 weeks, I do rush to an appointment the moment it resembles a mom bob even after I style it.
I do miss a ponytail though. Perhaps I will go down that road again someday. But not when I have to wake up at 5am and look presentable everyday. :)
Hey! I think you stole my hair–not long, not short, not straight, not curly, not thick, not thin, not blond (anymore), not brown. Total not hair. Although I make it to the stylist at least once every nine months, whether I need it or not (the split ends have to be at least an inch). This time, she flat ironed it straight (I haven’t had straight hair since I got a perm in 9th grade and it never went away). I didn’t recognize myself, but then I kind of liked it, and tried to get it to stay straight by slicking it down with water the next day…didn’t work so much. So back to the kinda wavy, kinda frizzy, at least it’s combed and has been washed in the last 24 hours do.
I am also a low-maintenance girl and have recently been lamenting the fact that it bleeds into every aspect of my life – not just my hair. No makeup except for the holiday party; jeans and t-shirts even though I have plenty of dressier outfits. I am so lame.
This reminds me….I need a hair cut and dye job!!! Its been way too long! Thanks for the reminder :)
Hi Tina – I forgot to mention in my post that I haven’t ever dyed my hair, but am really tempted to. I feel like I get a new gray hair every day so vanity may be the driving force to get me to start experimenting with color! :)
Yay! Kudos Kristen for taking the leap – it’s a big deal to change a hairstyle we’ve grown so comfortable with.
I did the half-up, half-down thing for most of my school years. I had long hair when I met my husband and got married, which I usually wore down. And then a few years later I made the leap to splurge for a great stylist at a great salon. I’ve been with her for about 8 years now. She knows me and my preferences, as well as how much change I can really handle. What more could you ask for?
Like you, I am LOW maintenance. I cannot commit to anything beyond blow drying. I would love to see pictures of your new hairdo as I think my next look is going to be long layers. I had had the same shoulder-length style for about 10 years and changed it up with bangs and husband is not a fan.
Hi Alecia – If I have the guts, I will have to post photos of my new look…that would also keep me honest about continuing to take care of it, knowing I have to look good enough to appear on the Internet! :)
Your comment also made me think about how funny my husband is about my hair. On the rare occasions I do get a haircut, he always says, “Not too short, please!” as I’m walking out the door. I honestly think he likes my hair long, lank, and lifeless. Ahh, men.
You must have gotten a GREAT cut if you were able to replicate it on your own! Kudos to your stylist. I have gone short and mid length but always end up back at long hair. I just find it easier. I like the options I have with longer hair and just don’t like having to DO my hair every day which I find I have to do with any length other than long. But I’ve always been told that the other lengths are more stylish… I’m sure your new do looks great! And where’s the picture?
Even when my hair is short, it takes a lot longer than 5 minutes to look presentable. It’s so thick! I am glad that you found a style that works for you. I am sure you look fantastic!
I’m glad I’m not the only one who wears a ponytail (or a bun) everyday. Every now and then, I’ll blow dry my hair and wear it down. I rely on lip gloss to look like I make an effort to appear presentable but your hilarious post reminds me it is ideed time for a haircut.
You tickled me that you clarified that was NOT a picture of you! I’m trying to decide whether to trade in my somewhat longer hair that I have to blow out and straight iron for a shorter do for the summer. I’m so indecisive these days.
First of all, I am totally low maintenance when it comes to hair. I wish it wasn’t so, and maybe I would straighten my curly mess sometimes, but alas. I will say that I handle my hair much better these days than I used to though. Once I found a salon who knew what to do with my curls, it was actually life-changing. Even my husband sings the praises of the salon and the salon products. I may be low maintenance, but I still want to look human!
Also, I am late to it but I just read your post from Wed and wanted to say I can totally relate. I too get worried about drowning in the blogosphere and missing out on real life, so I try to take weekends off. And I also believe in commenting only when you have something to say. If I commented on everything I read I would never do anything else… so I just have to trust that my readers will return because they like my writing, not cause I religiously comment on their blog. Just as I return to blogs I love, whether or not they love me…
totally low maintenance. periodically try to give a sh$# and end up not caring again. but I hate my hair. it’s true. sigh.
Delia Lloyd
http://www.realdelia.com
Alas, I have never had a good hair day in my life. I have crap hair.
I am also incredibly lazy about the styling of it and the makeup and the outfit. It depresses my Southern belle mother no end. Every time I see her, she says, “Honey, go put a little lipstick on.”
I am a processing unkie, as I have what closely resembles an afro when you add water and or humidity, both abundant in South Florida. I had short hair for a long time, and I have let it grow out so that I can wear it in a twist with a clip or in a ponytail.
I would love for my hair to be thick and just mildly wavy, alas, I was at the end of the line when they were handing out tresses. But as long as I can get a relaxer and get the gray out, I am okay.
So happy you are happy with the cut, and, above all, that you can replicate! Good for you!
I wore a flat top for years. Loved it. It was the original sleep and wear.
Do you think I could pull off a flat top, Jack? :)
I’m very much a low maintenance kind of girl. But I’m also sassy. I tend to change my hair style and color every few months, I get bored otherwise. Short and sassy suits me best. Although I do long for longer hair some days. But my SUPER thick hair doesn’t do long well. I end up looking like a mushroom head. Not a good look for me.
Hair is fun; it really makes such a statement.
My daughter has gotten me using a straightener these last months. Mine’s kinda in the middle, not straight, not curly. I love this sleek straight look. I’m also growing out bangs, which may be a bad move. But I like to live dangerously.
I have to admit I’m pretty high maintenance when it comes to hair, even though you would never know it to look at me. This is because I have difficult hair, AND I’m really bad with styling tools. Sigh. It’s a tricky combination…
Great job, Kristen! Resist the ponytail! You are not 10-years-old! (Okay, I admit that when I was ten I wore a ponytail for a whole year that was grease above the hair tie and a gigantic knot below it!)
My hair? Long layers with some framing the face. Blow dry, straighten, curl. Every damn day. I can’t seem to manage that brush/blowdryer thingie. Uncoordinated.
I’m totally uncoordinated too, but my stylist turned me on to a blowdryer that has a round brush attached so it’s an easy, one-handed maneuver. One of the all-time greatest inventions, I swear. :)
Haha!! I love this, as I’m currently having some hair issues of my own. I cut off all my hair in February (quite literally) and am now in that painful in between stage where it’s not short enough to be super cute like it was, but not long enough–at all–for me to do anything else with it. Sigh. But, judge not, lest ye be judged :)
That’s fantastic that you found a great style. My hair is just a curly wreck. There are two months out of the year where the weather works for me.
There is certainly some serendipitous irony here Kristen…since I have been out of the blogging/commenting loop (still on my total lack of balance over here)for over a week and now I come read this exactly 10 minutes after I dry my new hot pink/purplish streak…yes…streak. I know, Hanna Montana had one…but so did Gwen Stefani and Rachel McAdams waaaay before…and oh yeah, me, last year. Loved it so much that Hubby agreed to try it (as per the advice of my stylist ALSO NAMED MICHELLE..we-ird!) for me at home….it was quite amusing…shirtless tough guy with paintbrush and foil in hand. No kidding. Anyways…this is as high maintenance as I get in this area: color (usually blond, not fuschia). Every day I roll out of bed and whatever IT does, it does. As high maintenance as I am in the make-up/fashion/shoe department, I am so the other end on the hair. Congrats on your new ‘do and your success at 5 minutes!!!
Couldn’t resist…decided to post a quick one on the streak. Thanks. At least now I’ve only gone 8 days without a post. Whew. Hello? Balance, anyone? Anyone?
I was always a high-maintenance hair girl – until my son showed up, and those 20-30 minutes each morning suddenly seemed better spent on something else. I keep my hair short, but not wash-and-go short, so comparatively I might still have high-maintenance hair.
I’m a big fan of the blow dryer + big round brush regimen. I think I should make your five-minute success a self-challenge…
Five minutes? Really?? Where can I get one of these blow-dryer-brush-combo-magic-machines, and when will you be posting online step-by-step instructions, complete with photos? My ponytail is practically tingling with excitement … =>
I’m dying to get two tiny pink stripes down my side…
Hair styles can work wonders in the self-esteem department! I love my hair…its wash and wear.
This sounds so much like me. And I love it when I get a cut that actually is easy (I’m low-maintenance) and encourages me to forego the daily ponytail!
Hooray from someone who has been a wash-and-wear girl since she finally got that terrifying ’80s perm to grow out :). I go months between haircuts too. My latest excuse was that I was waiting for a coupon to come in the mail for the local discount place up the street, but I finally caved a few weeks before my recent trip. Too many relatives to see …
I’m low maintenance – I dont even want to dye my hair or bother with haircuts. But I do both anyway. I want to blow it dry and go. Not an easy thing to achieve with thick, straight-as-a-board hair. So I have one of those curling brush dryers and it satisfies my need for low effort while giving my hair actual style. I’m so glad someone invented those things!
I’m with you, Karen. All hail the inventor of the curling brush blow-dryer!
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